Tooth Club - Stratford Upon Avon

So, picture this: you’re in Stratford-upon-Avon, the birthplace of Shakespeare, expecting iambic pentameter and swan-filled rivers. Instead, you stumble into a speakeasy—but not for whiskey. For teeth. Welcome to Tooth Club, the weirdest, most wonderful dental-themed cocktail bar you never knew you needed.

The Shocking Origin Story

Tooth Club isn’t run by some rogue dentist with a grudge. It was founded by a couple who met while getting their wisdom teeth pulled (true story, I swear). They bonded over bloody gauze and a shared love of weird cocktails. Now, they serve drinks named “Molar Bear” and “The Plaque Is Mightier Than the Sword.”

One of the owners actually has a degree in dentistry. Yes, really. She says mixing drinks is like mixing fillings—just with more vodka and less screaming.

What’s Inside? (It’s Not What You Think)

Walk in and you’re greeted by a giant, glowing molar sculpture that looks like a rejected prop from a sci-fi movie. The walls are lined with vintage dental tools—forceps, drills, and a porcelain set of dentures that allegedly belonged to a local mayor. The bar stools are shaped like toothbrushes. It’s absurd. It’s glorious.

But here’s the kicker: the drinks come in little ceramic mouths. One straw goes in the “lip,” another in the “gum.” You feel like a giant pouring a mojito into a patient. It’s deeply unsettling and also the best photo op in town.

Tooth Club Stratford Upon Avon - Tooth Club

Surprising Facts That’ll Make You Gag (in a Good Way)

Tooth Club’s signature cocktail, “The Root Canal,” uses a real sugar-free syrup invented by a Swedish dentist. It’s zero-calorie, yet somehow tastes like caramel and revenge. The bar also hosts “Floss & Toss” nights where you floss between drinks—and win a free shot if you don’t snap the string.

One regular has been there 47 times and has never had a cavity. Correlation? Probably not. But he claims the bar’s fluoride-infused ice cubes are a “game-changer.” The owners refuse to confirm or deny. I’m not buying it, but I respect the hustle.

The Vibe: Chaotic and Unforgettable

This place is not for a quiet date. The music is loud—think techno remixes of “Brush Your Teeth” by Raffi. Waiters wear scrubs and joke about “extractions” when you finish your drink. One time, a guy choked on a cherry and the bartender yelled, “Don’t worry, I’m trained in the Heimlich and periodontal surgery!” Everyone laughed. He was serious.

Tooth Club Stratford Upon Avon - Tooth Club

But the best part? The “Tooth Fairy” surprise. If you can prove you’ve flossed that day (they have a UV light checker at the door), you get a free miniature tooth-shaped cookie covered in gold leaf. It tastes like victory and sugar.

Why You Should Go

Stratford-upon-Avon is full of sober, historical experiences. Shakespeare’s birthplace? Fine. A boat ride? Lovely. But Tooth Club is where you go to feel alive while pretending to be a dentist. It’s bizarre, hilarious, and weirdly educational—I learned that your tongue prints are unique, like fingerprints. The bartender told me that while pouring a tequila sunrise into a ceramic jaw.

So next time you’re in town, skip the sonnets. Head to Tooth Club. Order the “Pearly Gates” cocktail (gin, elderflower, and Listerine mist—yes, really). And remember: floss like nobody’s watching, because the UV light is. You’ve been warned.